Stories and News

Stories and News No. 41 : The Story : Dear friends, my daughters and sons, here I am. You, who one day will come all to me, without exception, you, who continually evoke me, you, who never miss the opportunity to sing hymns and say prayers in my behalf, instead of celebrating every moment what life means, you want an answer and I'm here to satisfy you. I have to help you; I must do it for all the attention that you give me. I am always in the middle of your news, including television and print media. I am the cause of your biggest fears, but at the same time you adore me, because more or less consciously you cultivated the resulting anguish as the farmer does with his more valuable land or as an introvert lover takes care of his secret passion. Extraordinary people pass undisturbed through your life, and yet you remember them only after my entry into the scene. I am the only light that can open your eyes to what is beautiful and the solitary voice able to move your head to what des...

Stories and News No. 40 : The Story : In the paradise of the most important artists of all time, the great Totò carefully observes what happens in Italy. He is obviously sorry for the insult done to his grave , but he knows that this is an injury that Naples has made to itself, because death is a level , and none better than him has been able to explain. The Prince reads the newspapers and could not miss the story of Berlusconi and Veronica. So he dedicates one of his poems to Silvio, English translation from Neapolitan language : What I miss! I have the money, I don’t miss anything, I can buy what I like: A gold statue, a silver boat... Palaces, villas... a lot of houses. - Who is happier than yourself? – People tell me. - You are rich, you're young (or rejuvenated…)... what do you miss? - And this is true, I don’t miss anything. I would like to buy just one thing... A heart... a heart full of tenderness A heart that cares of me as a mountain of love... A heart which makes me ap...

Stories and News No. 39 : The Story : A letter to Minister Brunetta : Dear Minister Brunetta, I am one of Italian fatty policemen. Your words - I quote: you cannot send a 'fat officer' who did nothing but paperwork, down in the streets - did not offend me. And this for a simple reason: I am proud of my overweight belly. Yes, I admit, I love good food. I just passed the forty and a serious knee injury does not allow me to be the man I was ten or twenty years ago. After work my life has become more sedentary, the money is never enough and so, the only pleasure I have now is when I use a spoon and a fork. My wife is good in the kitchen but I am great too. In reality, I am the best chef in the house and this is the reason why you can always be satisfied on our table. Everyone says it, including my mother-in-law and God knows if it's not a miracle to get her compliments... So I do not write you because I am hurt by your speech, rather to help you, because your words show that yo...

Stories and News No. 38 : The Story : Hi everyone and welcome to the most desired prize of the net: the Best Cynical Site 2009 , recognition to the most cynical web sites . Even this year it was not easy to make a choice. Cynicism is now a top value in all areas of the world. It is normal that it invaded Internet too. The jurors had spent many incandescent hours trying to find a common agreement on the choice to do and we want to ensure that all concurrent sites were worthy of getting on the podium. The research of the winner lasted until the judges have heard the news of the death of three workers in Sardinia, in the Saras refinery. As you all know the cynic has no scruples, or saying it as Oscar Wilde he is one who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing . Anything includes death too. People who can ignore it even when it is their affair, especially when it is indisputably their responsibility demonstrate an excellent cynicism. Here it is the home page of the Saras of...

Stories and News No. 37 : The Story : Noemi’s house. The girl is with her boyfriend Gino and suddenly the phone rings : Noemi: "Hello?" Mr. B.: "Hello, it’s me." Noemi: "Hello?! I don’t hear fine... Who are you?" Mr. B.: "It's me ... can you hear me?!" Gino: "Who's there?" Noemi: I didn’t understand ... Hello? Who are you? " Mr. B.: "It's me!" Noemi: "Oh my God… is it you ? But this is not the usual number... Did you change it?" Mr. B.: "No... however, listen to me carefully, I must tell you something important." Gino: "Who is?!" Noemi: "Shh! It’s him ..." Gino: "Oh..." Mr. B.: "Who is there with you?" Noemi: "None! It's the TV..." Mr. B: "Good. Listen, about our… relationship, you must deny everything, the kiss too. You have to say you told me to be 18 years old and that you told about us to your friends just for joking …" No...

Stories and News No. 36 The Story : This is the Press release sent today by St. Peter, the Lord’s Press officer : This morning the Lord with a capital L - otherwise embarrassing misunderstandings could happen... - has read with great pleasure the news about that Pope joined Facebook. The Lord with a capital L surfs the Web 2.0 since a long time and He subscribed to the famous social network months ago. However He has only two Friends contacts: St. Peter (myself) Lucifer (but he sends Him a lot of viruses...) So when He knew the good news, the Lord with a capital L went on Facebook to request friendship to Pope Ratzinger and He found this page: It is needless to say that the Lord with a capital L did not like what He found… First of all, it is not possible to ask the friendship to the Pope. My boss counted very much on it, because then He would have imported the many Pope’s friends to His space. Nothing, there is no way to be friends of the Pope. "Why he is on Facebook if you cann...

Stories and News No. 35 The Story : To the British Prosecutor, London Court, Lawsuit Act : The undersigned, legal representative of : God, the Lord, the supreme, eternal, infinite Creator of the universe. Stated as follows : 1) My Client does not need anymore presentations. 2) The Times on May 16 published an interview with Anna Palumbo in which my assisted was confused with the Italian Government Premier; the next day the mistake was corrected. 3) Silvio Berlusconi, according to our information, is a person of questionable morality and the mistaken for the one and only Lord is not acceptable to Him. So, according to the seventh commandment, as the Book of Exodus tells: You shall not make wrongful use of the name of the Lord your God, for the Lord will not acquit anyone who misuses his name . And to the facts above, it is proposed a lawsuit against the Times . However, since the newspaper is responsible for a mere transcription error and considering that Italian premier is true gu...